A flick of the past even in the present

I don't know why it made me cry..

Reading them, brought me to tears

Not to mention.. I found them in the shirt my half-brother gave to me a long time ago

So I didn't really tell anyone how I was

My mood went up and down a lot that day

Old memories..

Is it bad I wish to forget the past because I miss it and know it will never be the same?

Yet.. at other times I wish to remember, to never forget

"It's like there are two people inside of me, fighting for control of me."

So true.. three years ago and I still felt the same

"I sit in the darkness waiting for death to come and claim me. Each time I think it's about to come, something seems to save me. What do I do? I'm being pulled in two directions! Please... just let death have me. It won't matter...."

It wouldn't have made much of a difference then.. but now

I have people to hold dear

"I don't give a shit if Diana is losing faith in me. To me, she isn't someone I'm close to, I don't even consider her my mom or even as a friend. More like a stranger."

So true throughout the time we lived with each other

There is more, but it seems..

That even three years later..

Everything seems to be almost the exact same as I wrote

Minus Diana, Willie

I find that funny

Finding things like these, through my mind into an unyielding flow of the past and jitters for what is to come